Coney Island Baby

This being the glorious tail end of summer—we have, what, at least four weeks left of lovely weather and a few weeks before school starts for those unlucky young’uns—it’s an ideal time to evoke images of Coney Island. I’ve only been there once, early this May, when it was still spring.

For those who have never been to Coney Island, the utterance of the name will still not fail to conjure up images of hot dogs…Nathan’s Famous Hot Dogs. In fact, some sources go so far as to claim Coney Island/Nathan’s as the birthplace of the hot dog, but I heavily dispute this (the birthplace of the hot dog could be anywhere some hungry sod first slipped a sausage into a hunk of bread and called it a day). Even so, Coney Island’s role in American hot dog lore cannot be underestimated.

New Yorkers have been heading out to Coney Island for oceanside frolicking since the early 1830s, when a shell road led out to the place. It was a den of gambling, whoring, and full-body-coverage bathing suits. A friend told me that Coney Island was built as an attraction to get people to ride public transit to the end of the line, but this is not true; over the years, many forms or transit, such as boats, roads, street cars, and trains, have been employed to make it easier for folks to get to Coney Island. From what I’ve read, the subway extension to Coney Island was completed in the 1920s, allowing poor folks access for around a nickel.

Nowadays you go on the N trail to get to Coney. We took the N from its northern terminus in Queens and rode it all the way to Coney Island, the southern terminus. It takes over an hour. Bring a book or some friends and a Mad Libs tablet.

There were big Coney Island eateries prior to Nathan’s, but Nathan’s is the only old-schooler going strong today. Restaurateur Nathan Handwerker opened his place around 1916, but didn’t find success until the early 1920s. (Get the full scoop here.)

Nathan’s is now a national franchise, selling hot dogs in food courts in malls and airport terminals. I’d never had one of their dogs, though, until visiting Coney Island in May. Might as well hold out for the original, huh? Here’s what I wrote in my journal:

“We ate at the Coney Island Nathan’s today, Sunday 5/15. Joe was angry because the ditzy girl at the counter mistook our order and we wound up with two extra hot dogs, making a grand total of 4 hot dogs between me and Joe. The breakdown:
-1 kid’s meal (hot dog w/kraut, fries, Diet Coke, toy)
-1 kid’s meal (hot dog w/onions & kraut, fries, Diet Coke, toy)
-2 hot dogs w/onions & kraut
The franks themselves were good—long and slender, good snap, griddled & greasy w/a natural casing. The buns were cold—well, not hot—and they were very bad-squishy by the time we got around to eating the final two dogs. Nathan’s only has spicy mustard—no yellow. Forget the ketchup, even if their onions are not the sweet, tomotoey ones like Gray’s Papaya. Nathan’s onions get lowest marks: slimy, too oniony, too long and wormlike, and most of all smacking of tinned black pepper. Ick! In my estimation, black pepper has no business being on a hot dog unless it’s mixed into coleslaw.
Nathan’s fries are thick, broad and crinkle-cut. They are too heavy/mealy and the ones in our kid’s meals were in dire need of salt. I feel pre-salted fries are far superior to those which the diner themselves applies the salt. Skip the fries.
Kelly told me that the Coney Island Nathan’s is not the best one because they can get away with being mediocre. I readily believe that. Coney Island was a blast, but Nathan’s was a lowlight in a day of highs. I ate 2-1/2 dogs and am feeling ill. I have a long way to go before I am a hot dog pro.”

Coney Island is worth a visit for its other attractions, most notably the Cyclone roller coaster and the Sideshow. The place wrings its appeal out of a faded, decaying glory. People come for the sadness of its midway full of skuzzy carnies and the greasy fried clams that every Coney Island food stand sells. The also come for Nathan’s 4th of July Hot Dog Eating Contest, where that skinny Japanese guy always wins. Even if the dogs are mediocre, one must visit Nathan’s when at Coney Island. That’s all there is to it. Maybe get one lone hot dog and move on.